Search Results for “fear” – The Collective Soul Blog

Are Fear and Guilt Holding you Back?

Is FEAR holding you back from asking for help? Support? Love? Or getting what you need? Fear of rejection? Fear of looking too needy? Fear of being vulnerable? Fear of looking like you don’t have your shit together? Or is it GUILT? Guilt that you need help because others also need help? Guilt that you’re…
Top 4 Manipulation Tactics a Narcissist Uses To Destroy Your Self-Trust

In a narcissistic abusive relationship, the narcissist will do all he/she can to exert control in the relationship. The way in which they obtain that control is by slowly disconnecting you from your power. There are many different forms of psychological and emotional manipulation tactics that they may use to accomplish this. Here are the…
What is Your Life Purpose?

If you were to poll random strangers and ask them whether or not they had found their purpose in life, they would likely look at you quizzically. Most people would assume that you were asking if they had found their dream job or whether they loved being Tommy’s mom or dad, David’s wife or Sarah’s…
The Truth About People Pleasing

People Pleasing is a behavior often learned in childhood as a self-preservation technique. It becomes a way of getting our needs met by receiving recognition or attention for being “the good girl or boy,” the “helpful one,” the “easy-going one,” the “kind and generous one,” the “selfless one,” the “thoughtful one,” the “high achiever,” the…
Failure Is Not an Option

The other day, I was driving along the highway with my son on our way for a hike when a truck passed us by with the slogan, “Failure is not an option.” My first thought was, “How appropriate for a logistics company,” followed by, “that statement feels incomplete.” The way I interpreted it, it seemed…
Breaking the Chains, Rewriting the Narrative

When we pin our happiness upon someone or something outside of us, that someone or something hijacks our opportunity to love ourselves fully and completely because we depend on someone else to do it for us rather than taking responsibility. Until they no longer “love us”, and then we find ourselves crying into a never-ending…
What is Holding You Back?

In biology, a cell can either be in growth or protection mode, never both at the same time. When a cell is in protection mode, it uses all of its energy to preserve its original state, to prevent it from evolving, growing or changing. Similarly, in life, you, too, can not grow and evolve and…
What If In Order to Come Together, We First Have to Fall Apart?

Imagine at birth, you were given all of the pieces of a puzzle that you needed to become the best version of you. Imagine then throughout your life, that you learned to hide some of the pieces because you didn’t think they would help you fit in. Perhaps you took pieces from others that you believed would help…
Are You a People Pleaser?

For most of my life, I have been the easy going one, the agreeable one, the pleasant one, the one who didn’t make waves, cause conflict or drama. I never tried to take up more space than I occupied (unless I was on stage) and I would often avoid conflict and confrontation because it made…
Is It Resiliency or Courage?

True resiliency occurs when we fully recover from a disruptive experience – heal from the trauma, feel and process the emotions, learn the lessons we were meant to learn, and then release it so that it no longer triggers us. There is a subtle nuance to the words we use. Sometimes we confuse courage and…